You Might Be Addicted to IRC if...

Collected from the net:

... there is an channel named after your nick
... more people call you by your nick than by your real name
... you ever said ROTFLOL in RL
... you look in the mirror and ask "Does /me look like :-/, :-), or $:-o"
... your parents have to buy a computer to stay in contact with you
... you discover that most people in your address book are from IRC
... you celebrate your birthday at #mybirthdayparty
... you ever had dreams about being in channel or about your fellow chnannel rats
... you need to scroll through your popups menu
... you label your door bell "/sound doorbell.wav"
... you say "hehehehehehe" when you try to laugh
... your service provider calls *you* for tech support
... someone at work tells you a joke, and you say "LOL!"
... you watch T.V. with closed captioning turned on
... your friend Tom tells you something sad on the phone and you say "Awwww, me hugs Tom"
... you keep begging your friends to get an internet account so "we can hang out"
... three words: carpal tunnel syndrome
... you once devoted a weekend to "working on your popups"
... you sometimes go to #europe "just to get away from it all"
... the words "takeover," "nick collide," and "flood" make your heart beat faster and your hands a little shakey
... sometimes you type commands from the unix prompt, you mistakenly begin them with a "/"
... you've ever gotten onto an airplane just to meet some folks face to face
... you make it a point to change your ping reply and quit message daily
... you have over 2 megs of .wav files on your mirc directory
... your child ignores your request and you wonder if she is lagged
... you have ever wondered if there is a #irc-anon
... you go into labor and you stop to type a "special" away message
... you have a vanity car tag with your nick on it
... you no longer type with proper punctuation, capitalization, or complete sentences
... you get a call from a telemarketer, and instead of hanging up on them, you set down the phone, and set their mode to -v
... you call up your friend Nick and /invite $nick to #watch_TV
... you offer the babysitter OPS when you go out for the night
... you refer to rush hour traffic as LAGGED... or to avoid traffic, you tell your passenger you need to quit for a second to switch servers
... you have more than 3 PM windows going simultaneously
... instead of taking a disk home from work, you set up your BOT to serve it to you later that night
... you don't sleep at night because you are staying up late thinking of a new NICK
... when someone says "what did you say?" you reply "scroll up!"
... you know more about your irc friends daily routines than you do your own spouse's
... when someone in channel says "where is [nick] today," you know exactly where that person is and why they are not logged on
... you have an identity crisis if someone else is using your nick.\
... you change nicks so much that you have to do a /whois to see who you are
... you ever turned down real hugs for {({hugs})} from your irc friends
... you have actually kept up with 10 converstions at one time <--- this one shows either great skill or that you are too far gone
... you ever got mad at someone in RL and wanted to kick, kickban, ban, k-line, or g-line then
... you type messages to people while you're talking to them on the phone
... you sign your nick instead of your "real name"
... you have to replace your / and # keys every few weeks
... you enter a channel and the bots say hi
... you suggest to your company to hold its meetings on IRC so "The boss can put +m on"
... you name your pets after people you talk to on IRC.
... you ever tell a story in RL of something funny that happened on IRC to people that have no idea what it is
... whenever a netsplit or mode change occurs and someone asks what happened everyone in the channel says to ask you
... you got tired of answering what happened and have made popups to describe netsplits and mode changes
... you are in a car wreck, you are released after several weeks, and you get pulled over by the police because you were reported as missing
... you are in a car wreck, and your channels know right away
... your friend in RL doesn't answer you, and you wonder how to PING him
... you know not only the best servers to access, but also the best ports
... you take a speed reading course to keep up with the scrolling
... your worst comeback to a bully is "I'll slap you with a large trout"
... you read every single line of this page
... when you wake up in the morning, the first thing you do is get on to IRC before you have your coffee
... you enter a room, and you say /me greets all
... you are cutting and pasting this list to someone in PM